Team BergeronThe Good Life

Accepting Criticism & How Perception Is Reality

posted by Heather August 24, 2018 0 comments

O’Keefe must be at CrossFit HQ 🙂

   

There are few things harder in life to accept than criticism of your actions.  I think the only thing that might trump that is feeling love for someone that does not love you back. 

But, that’s a topic for another post. 

Actually, that may be so hard that I don’t even want to go there. 

Like, ever.

Hearing criticism is tough, though.  It’s very easy to talk about “being open to crticism” and even claiming that you seek it out.  But, I do think there are forms of criticism that are easier to hear than others.

When you get criticism on your snatch technique or the outfit you’re about to wear to a wedding…totally.  Bring it.

But, when it’s about anything involving your kids or something a parent or in-law says about how you’re living your life…those are the ones that are harder to digest.  I think because they’re more opinionated and borderline judgemental, whereas someone telling me that I have an early arm pull in the middle of my lift is just a factual sort of thing. 

Even with the outfit example, it’s like you know what?  You’re probably right: tube tops sort of do give me uniboob and make me look more Vin Diesel than Angelina Jolie.

You right.

Yesterday, I posted a picture of Harley Love on social media because, after disappearing from the back yard for about 5 minutes, she walks back out in shiny silver ballet flats, mid-shin striped bunny socks, her My Little Pony undies, her hot pink First Lady dress wrapped around one of her hands…and, she strikes a pose as if to say, “I just killed it up there in my closet.”  Couldn’t have been prouder of the outfit she had on and had the attitude to match it perfectly.

I thought it was hysterical, so I quick snapped a picture and posted it with some hashtags that just came to mind in the hot second.

When I looked back at the post a little while later, there were a couple of comments attacking me for being inappropriate with a young child and sexualizing her by both the picture I used and the words I chose.

Now, I like having fun posting things about the things that happen in my daily life, but I definitely don’t want to be the stimulus for some big debate or controversy.  Regardless of what my intention was, there were people out there that felt what I had done was wrong and I didn’t want to cause a scene even though, in my mind, it was innocent.

After talking with a few family and friends, there were mixed emotions on the whole topic, but I couldn’t get it out of my head for the rest of the night, I lost sleep over it, and I’m still sitting here at sunrise having trouble letting go of the whole thing.

This is the sort of criticism that’s a lot harder to swallow than movement technique.

I guess it’s because, in my mind, I wasn’t thinking about things that were inappropriate.  I was thinking about how funny her personality is and how much I love her “style”…and, I thought other people would think of it like that and not how I was relating her to a promiscuous woman.

But, when I can find it in my ego to swallow my pride and keep my mind open, I am able to be rational enough to default to the people that find things I do offensive and wrong in some way.

It may not have been my intention, but perception is reality. 

Even if the perception isn’t one that I share with someone else.

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