The Good Life

I like to think of things as “projects”. Just the idea of working on a “project” vs. fixing something or getting better at something sounds so much more motivating to me. Whether it’s a manual labor thing like power washing the deck or working on my fitness, changing my perspective on how I mentally approach it is actually a game changer for me. Identifying with something as a project makes me feel like I just need…

It’s terrifying to have a voice in social media. We don’t want to offend anyone, so we think it’s better to say nothing. But, we also know that saying nothing says more than just saying something. But, just saying something isn’t saying enough. There are so many ways our black population has been wronged for so long. And, while the state of the world is so difficult to witness right now, it seems to be…

Do you know what’s hard? Being the positive one in a room full of people that are being negative. And, it’s in our nature to do what is easy, safe, and doesn’t threaten our connections with others. Fortunately, what I’ve found is this: our energies and perspectives are contagious. In most situations, what we put out there is given back to us. And, that goes for both positivity and negativity. If we start a conversation…

I have spent the better part of my life going through layers of phases of trying be the best: the best athlete, the best mother, the best wife…writer, homemaker, friend, dressed. The voice inside my head was always wanting more than what I was seeing in myself. I’ve wanted my kids, and even their friends, to like me the most. I’ve wanted to be the best athlete in our gym. And, I’ve spent probably my…

When I was snuggling Harley Love to sleep last night, I said, “I love you so much, Harley Love.” She replied with, “I love you more.” “Oh, Harley Love, that’s impossible because I love you with Mommy love.” “What’s that?” “It’s a very special kind of love that is different than any other kind of love in the whole world. It’s even different than the way I love Daddy.” “Is it SECRET???” I laughed. “No,…

Ever since the kids were little, I’ve always woken them up by saying with the absolute most amount of drama and excitement I’m able to muster at an early hour, “Guess what!?! Did you hear!?! TODAY is going to be the best day of your entire life!” It’s actually a great way to wake up. You’re still so foggy and vulnerable that you could be told, basically, anything and would believe it. And, while the…

I had a moment today when I was listening to someone talking to Bode and Harley Love.  The person was saying goodbye to Bode and said, “Make sure you keep playing chess.” Then, Harley Love stepped up to say goodbye, and they said, “And, you just stay beautiful.” And, it dawned on me that those are the sorts of comments that drive our kids’ visions and goals and expectations of themselves. Bode is heading out…

“For every event in life,” the Dalai Lama said, “there are many different angles. When you look at the same event from a wider perspective, your sense of worry and anxiety reduces and you have greater joy.” A cold, rainy day can be viewed as miserable and depressing. Or, it can be a perfect opportunity to catch up on laundry, a great book next to a fire, or day to slow everything down and find…

Setting unrealistic expectations sets us up for disappointment. And, there are few things more unrealistic than expecting the people in our lives that are closest to us to be our everything. One person can’t, and shouldn’t, be the best listener we know, the wisest one that we go to first with all life challenges, the smartest one that we learn the most from, the best person for fashion and beauty advice, the one that makes…