Girlfriends, here’s the painful truth: guys think we’re crazy. No, like, actually crazy. And, when they’re finally trying to dial it in and decide on who the girl is that they want to end up committing to, the decision comes down to this: which one is the least crazy, while still having all of the “good” stuff, too (attractive, fun to hang out with, similar lifestyle, has a functioning brain, etc.). *Ben actually just goes, “The brain part? Meh.” Apparently, lucky for me, the brain thing doesn’t even matter.
I wanted so badly to disprove this whole argument when Ben and I were in the heat of it today, but I have to be honest and say that I had trouble coming up with more than 1 girlfriend of mine who had all the good stuff…and, didn’t have a noticeable “crazy” quality, too.
The whole conversation started with me telling Ben that I still question his character for having stayed with me even after I unveiled my own levels of crazy several different times when we were starting to date. He admitted to knowing at the time about all of the crazy parts of me, but finally said that after going through the whole dating scene…I was his best worst case scenario of crazy.
Ben right now: “DON’T SAY THAT!”
Me right now: “WELL, THAT’S WHAT YOU SAID.”
The thing that many of us, including myself, have a tendency to do is react when we really should respond. Reacting is more impulsive, emotional, and the times we regret saying something in the heat of a moment. Responding is more thoughtful, patient, and leaves us feeling like we turned a conflict with someone into an opportunity to improve our relationship with them, not drive them further away from us.
Listen, let’s not turn this into a deep, intellectual look at the state of relationship dynamics. Take these words for what I meant for them to be: an opportunity to laugh at ourselves for things we’ve likely been guilty of at some point in our lives. No, it’s not just girls and this doesn’t pertain to all girls, all of the time. Our feelings are worthy and real, not “crazy”. And, yes, brains are important. Just not to my husband, thank God.
But, it never hurts to tuck that crazy deep down in a pocket and save it for a really “special” moment 😉