Just Care

posted by Heather April 12, 2021 0 comments
17 Days post-surgery ROM 🙂
Been looking up n hairstyles for this one. Just creating a monster, which I know I will regret someday.
Stocking up for Spring time in the greatest neighborhood of all time 🙂
The alcohol content in this terrifies me. I think I’ll pass on this one. Not into drinking gasoline these days.
This one lasted for about 90 seconds.
What is it with men and their need to carry flossers around with them? Found this on Rob’s cell phone, which I also thought was an interesting spot to store your flosser.
Like a GLOVE.
Bode woke up not being able to put weight on his leg. Was fine going to bed the night before, but actually couldn’t stand on it without breaking into a puddle of tears.
Again, 90 seconds.
3 weeks and this kid is home from her Junior year at UMass.
Thanks for this, Morgan and Katie!
Easter egg hunt on the Cape lawn 🙂
Maya and her roommates at their “Easter Brunch”. Very classy 😉
Snuck this photo of Ben during our Wim Hof breathing/meditation session.
Neighborhood egg hunt.
Easter brunch at Ben’s mom’s house.
Admit this is funny.
The Greenest Smoothie marathon goes on.
This NEVER gets old. Does it?
Talked my father into sleeping with tape on his mouth to promote nasal breathing in an attempt to help with his sleep apnea. Reading interesting stuff in a great book called ‘Breath’.
The trail run at the 2009 CrossFit Games at the Ranch.

I called Maya at college one day recently, and could tell with her first sentence that something was off. She finally admitted that she was stressing out over a conversation she had just had with a co-worker. 

The details aren’t really important, but she basically hadn’t followed up entirely on something with this guy and he ended up doing work that didn’t need to be done. And, she felt like he must’ve been so frustrated with her that he wanted to kill her. She felt awful. And, likely because of an entire childhood of her being raised by ME, a guilt dropping mother, she was basically frozen sitting there feeling so bad about messing up and wasting his time on something that he never really needed to do.

When it first happened, Maya apologized immediately, but she didn’t really explain how badly she felt. So, I ended up suggesting to her that she call him. I, specifically, told her not to text because so much can get lost through text. She did call, told him how badly she felt about the whole thing, and he said what I told her was likely the case: she shouldn’t feel that bad, he appreciated the call, and that it wasn’t a big deal at all.

The whole thing just reminded me how much we create in our own head. How much anxiety and anticipation we are walking around with, when other people are in a totally different headspace about something than we are. We “think” that whatever we’re thinking is fact, and there’s really no way it could be anything else. But, what we’re thinking, is just that: our own thoughts. And, we all have our own thoughts.

Having said that, there are plenty of times when we’re right. Other people are, in fact, feeling frustrated with our inefficiencies and/or times when something we do negatively affects them in some way.

In my experience, though, what people really care about is just knowing that you care. They don’t need a fix for a problem you created, necessarily; they just want to know that you know you messed up, and that you feel really bad about it. That’s all. They just want to hear words, sincere words, that show you noticed what you did…and, that you care. About them. 

It’s so simple and so easy, and it changes everything.